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I LIED THIS IS ACTUALLY MY FIFTH OR SIXTH QUESTION MEME???? WHATEVER
IT'S BEEN A WHILE OK!!!! and also thorfinn just got 8k from viking makeouts and stuff so ask me things. if you comment I will tl;dr about our character relations.
current roster:
Thorfinn/Leif
Aradia Megido/Dream Bubble Navigator
Kuroko Tetsuya/Aconite
Ueki Kousuke/Clover
The Festival Girl
Kirito/Canis
Cecilia
The Witch
you can also ask me questions for characters from:
• Holly Heights - Thorfinn and Lily Rammsteiner
• Amat Omnes - Nill
. . . or characters that I previously played and dropped!
current roster:
Thorfinn/Leif
Aradia Megido/Dream Bubble Navigator
Kuroko Tetsuya/Aconite
Ueki Kousuke/Clover
The Festival Girl
Kirito/Canis
Cecilia
The Witch
you can also ask me questions for characters from:
• Holly Heights - Thorfinn and Lily Rammsteiner
• Amat Omnes - Nill
. . . or characters that I previously played and dropped!
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part 1 of 2 in case i fall asleep typing this up (agan)
ok a lot of thorfinn's misplaced animosity toward melody is because of bad timing, circumstance, and also the fact that she's a girl. straight up. pastel left and now there's this creature he doesn't understand on their team and he's not entirely sure he wants this. he doesn't know how to deal with girls, how to talk to them, so even if there were no issues with pastel he would still probably avoid her a lot.
. . . but, well, there are pastel issues. pastel & kitsunebi are the ones thorfinn considers personally under his charge. kitsunebi, because sieh told him to take care of him. pastel, because pastel is too damn scared of everything and it's concerning when your teammate is like that. so there's everyone in tiger's eye, who thorfinn considers important, but kitsunebi and pastel are especially important to his personal obligation.
so when he left, and was replaced by melody. . . well, he wasn't exactly pleased! and it was also TE's first turnover in a bit, since regal entered the book, which was when pastel came in. so. . . . pastel was the most recent to come, and then was the first to leave, and although pastel was only in game for about an IC month, it hadn't taken much for thorfinn to attach himself to pastel and tsun really hard. so when he left, it was. really hard for thorfinn - not only because of the emotional attachment he did have to pastel, how responsible he felt for pastel (although he rarely showed it), but because it was a reminder that everything he loves is going to leave, except rider because rider promised. so . . . what is the point of trying to get attached to newer teammates? they'll leave. he'll leave, eventually. even his older teammates will leave. and pastel leaving just gave him a strong reminder of that.
so initially he's got all these pastel feelings and missing teammate feelings and also hopeless feelings because his teammates are going to leave him eventually! that's how he starts with melody, even before they exchange words. and they don't even really exchange words, because thorfinn didn't actually care to be considerate or anything. he's a jackass.
but the things that happened in the cabin: him moving his things so that they're mostly hidden under the bed, away from her eyes, him sleeping near the front door and also on the couches of the basement again - these are things he'd have done if any turnover occurred at all with anyone, because he's just not very used to that and he's not accommodating enough to try to deal with that change while being welcoming to the newcomer. he just leaves the situation until he feels comfortable enough with the person through interaction osmosis, being in the same room together, kind of thing - give it time and mundane life, and he'll start easing back to sleeping in his bed and such; he just needs to get used to a new presence in the cabin and until then he won't sleep properly.
OF COURSE there are more issues than just that. if it was any other teammate, he would be pretty good with just this much. but with melody, thorfinn actively avoided being even in the same room as her! so he didn't get used to her, he just left, he didn't want to be near her - because he doesn't understand her, and he doesn't want to be understood by her. he avoids her, therefore. and he's got reason to avoid her, which ends up being highlighted in his skill taking thread - he doesn't want to deal with someone who imposes themselves on his feelings and tries to understand them when he doesn't appreciate that. he doesn't want to deal with someone who says that they care, when they've done jack shit together and the only thing that binds them is the color yellow. sure, there's team obligation there, but there's no personal reason for her to care about him. and. yet she says she does. she has interest in him. he doesn't want that. he doesn't want her to do that because if she starts, he's going to start tsunning for her and then start to like her and he really doesn't want that, because it's pointless to like new teammates; see above.
then dreaming happened and daddy issues came along. he's not entirely sure how! nor is it a scene that's familiar to him, who's always had a good father who loved him (and that's his problem, really) - but he gets that it's important, he gets that she hurts from it because rider hurts from daddy issues and he hates seeing rider hurt. so he gets that it's a bad thing, but he also. . . . didn't voluntarily try to get to know her. that's a thing that happened against his own volition. so it's awkward for him, he doesn't know what to do except ignore it because he doesn't actually have the emotional capacity or coping capabilities to help someone when they are feeling bad about such strong issues, especially when he himself hasn't actually experienced any of that. he doesn't know how to comfort so he ended up quietly ignoring. also, in the dream, there ended up being a little knowledge dere because thorfinn has little idea of how the future works and seeing the food menu was really fabulous in his opinion, although he didn't mean to get so enamored with it.
i meant to type again and my icon above is a sleepy icon too
he was also pretty ???? about her trying to care about his injuries when she had to break a finger and whatnot, like. what's with your priorities girl, think of yourself first. he's still not used to people fussing over him and then here's this girl who he was completely shitty to and she still cares enough to start ripping her shirt up and whatnot and throwing bandages at him. uhm. why. how happen. he's still bristly about using those bandages too on himself but he did help alma with them! so it's not like he completely condemned the bandages it's just that he doesn't need them stop being concerned you silly little girl.
and in the same game, he kind of. . . tried to ignore all the secrets because it was all why oh god for him and then there was more unwillingly learning more about melody, because the game provided her secrets to him. non-consensual learning about teammates why. he's putting them under the metaphorical rug but it's still . . . like. . . . the realization that oh, melody is a person. with feelings. and thoughts. that he can understand. wow this is a problem how am i going to continue being a jackass to her without feeling increasingly awful about it shit.
reverse me!?!!??!?!
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... god we'll be here for awhile won't be, i think that's aradia/tavros, kuroko/valerian, diamond/clover, melody/cecilia???
i'm going to cry ARADIA/TAVROS
so she's just kind of. leaving it alone, she's not afraid to touch upon the subject if it's something that pops up but she won't really talk about it otherwise. she's also pretty mmmmmmwellllhmmmmm about being best friends - she doesn't really remember what being a "best friend" entails, nor does she want to impose on being a best friend to tavros and being entitled to whatever as his best friend because she doesn't remember what they did as best friends, just that they didn't create sick fires. it's really not something that's an active adverse force either, like the above - it's not a negative thing for her, it's just A Thing that she just has to get around and get used to and such. so she's feeling herself out! doing things like going on adventures and then with conversations talking about silly things, sometimes asking what he's up to but not doing that all the time - she doesn't need to keep tabs on him or anything after all, so even tho he looked pleased as punch in beauty's & mal's game she didn't really bother pressing to ask further than "o you look pleased!" - it's not really her business if he doesn't want it to be her business and she gets that, so she'll just take whatever she can in stride, and do the same. she feeeeels like being "best friend" is sort of superficial, because she's not really aradia the best friend when she doesn't remember anything, but she's cool with that - it's just a matter of doing it again here, and she doesn't feel the need to obnoxiously get into tavros's face and force herself in with best friend entitlement, she doesn't really know how close they were other than "best friend" in their universe and in aather tavros has his own team and they're not really teammates anymore and he's got his own friends, his own history too. which is ok, she's not displeased or sad about that or anything because that's cool and they had their own time and she just needs to remember their own time and they can start doing new things! no time to reflect on the past and try to force that to happen again (esp when she doesn't remember), just time for making new memories. ok chizu how many times can you say the same thing over and over.
as for first impressions, it's basically the same - a superficial "best friend!" impression, but one that she'd like to make more than just superficial.
KUROKO/VALERIAN
which is valerian yes good come to sage all the time all day every day stay here ok don't go back to celeste. and kuroko feels a little bad about wanting to keep valerian in sage but still he was happier in sage okok. (and then that happened and it was exciting)
as for relationship, nothing's changed from that front! mostly just more co-dependency and also the potential to yan harder, since the recent hostage game has made kuroko realize that \:D/ he's okay with hurting others to save sage. not okay, but he'll do it.
RECENTLY kuroko's been entertaining the idea that either he or tavros are the next to leave, in sage! because they're the oldest members, and the older members of each team seem to be leaving, so it would make sense if either he or valerian left next. which is ok, although he's also really sad about that. k-kuroko's bad at not thinking about sad things. \o/;;;
Re: KUROKO/VALERIAN
Re: KUROKO/VALERIAN
DIAMOND/CLOVER
the answer is no????????? HE'S REALLY BAD AT. hmm, deeper levels of conscious thinking and then labeling them as deeper levels of thinking. it's just kind of this sea of thinking that is deep and also shallow at the same time, he doesn't really think too hard either. \o/ so right now diamond is TEAMMATE.... and also hm limbs come off sometimes so maybe she'll have to deal with that (no she's not going to deal with that because clover won't let that happen :) he's going to take the hit :) before she ever can :)!!!!!! extreme shounen) and it really doesn't bother him that she's a girl who lives in the same place as him but are their underwears going to get mixed up or something?
the above is an example of his shallow&deep simultaneous thinking, he just thinks about both mutilation and limb ripping and also laundry and eating in the same thought train. he's just. dumb..............
as for opinion, he doesn't really have one of her. oh, she's a teammate. that's cool.
...
...
...
that's pretty much it HE'S NOT VERY.. THOUGHT..FUL...... i'm sorry.
MELODY/CECILIA
cecilia also extreeemely likes melody because she got her name. uwu thank you for helping me remember i am a hooman.
OKAY REVERSE ME payback time
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Aradia/Tavros
HE'S... really happy to have her around? He missed her a lot. But he realizes that here he is with a lot of memories while Aradia has barely any and he honestly didn't think about that at first but now he feels. Really awkward around her? Like. Especially after the Sollux my/our friend thing. He loves her as a friend a lot but also he doesn't ... want to force a best friendship when Aradia barely even remembers anything but he wants it so badly but he won't force it either. He really really wants to get that friendship back, though, so he's gonna try! He just has to get over his own awkwardness because he remembers a lot about Aradia whereas she doesn't remember a lot about him.
Kuroko/Valerian
KUROKO. /// He loves and trusts Kuroko a lot and there's a hideous codepedency there and man if anyone hurts him he will be super angry, as he showed when he found out about Shark in the Trauma Bingo game! That made him so mad. B( He won't attack anyone or use games as revenge because Sage has firmly established that that is Not Their Thing and it will Never Be Their Thing! And that's fine and okay he'll just beat the crap out of vines on Level 3 or swing Cleo's sword around until some decent technique falls out.
Valerian's sort of been entertaining that idea too, especially since it's basically been confirmed that there is no giving up involved with good ends as it has been implied! Coco was definitely not giving up! And the fact that that is a thing makes him kind of o_o because he doesn't want to leave until he's finished his job because he's not about to be a promise breaker. He tends to not think about it, though, because that implies that someone is gonna leave so let's not think about that.
Diamond/Clover
First impressions so far are that he's dumb as a brick but also he's not a bad kid. :|a He obviously doesn't want people to get hurt and he wants to help people which is a lot of SUPER AWESOME points in Diamond's book! But he's also dumb as a brick and boy don't you dare throw yourself to the zombies because I'm not letting a teammate do that. She's not afraid to smack him around if she has to and he seems to respond to her concern about things well and! Yes basically it's POSITIVE but boy you are dumb as a brick but I like you anyway.
Melody/Cecilia
CUTEST PATRON /// Melody loves her because she fits Takshaka so well. Like, before they even knew their patron they were already picking incredibly airy things like bird names and their dorm ended up being all open spaces and bird stuff! And basically she's the perfect patron and she's very proud of herself for guessing Cecilia's name. '^'
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thorfinn versus apple is "thorfinn constantly tries to be casual while talking to a girl" and it's really awkward for him ok. he's just bad at social and so it just gets worse because she's a girl - at least, that's his impression. then it's like, talks to apple => oh it's not as bad as i thought it would be HMMMmmm. without realizing it, he kind of. got used to talking to her. \:U/ they're not very frequeentttt talks which would not really affect him much anyway, if they talked every day he could still feel awk - but he's nottt so awkkkk because there haven't really been many personal feelings on this and they've mostly talked about plants or what a doctor is (and a good deal of their initial interaction was from the game when he had social skills so that helped immensely in smoothing over to being OK with talking to her). and then it was like, ohhhhhhh okay let's talk about my world and how much it sucks. huhh. wow i don't really talk about that with a lot of people. ...well ok!!!
basically if you didn't understand the above (it's 4AM i'm babbling) there are essentially two kinds of interactions that thorfinn will have, which is either 1) BIG SPIKY INTERACTION where the amount of interaction doesn't really matter so much as the topic of conversation - it might hit really deeply into him or something so he'll either tsun hard or he'll be really hissy, those are the only two options. or 2) OH I'M USED TO YOU SURPRISE?????, which is like. . . conversations don't really stick on him emotionally, but he gets used to the person, so more conversation comes and then he talks about himself and then we start comparing mounds of dead people to mountains of dead people. and the latter is apple. so. i'm sorry that was just more confusing.
BUT ARE WE COOL SIS
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A lot of his social awkwardness goes over her head somehow, probably because their big chuck of initial interaction was when he didn’t have a problem talking to her! And he was a sociable little tiny with her. All of their conversations have given them a topic to discuss in which she has Opinions so she ends up feeling like any kind of off put attitude would be because of the topic at hand. He seems like a good kid with a kind heart, and his dad-figure-thing was so proud of him that she’s just decided HE IS A GOOD PERSON. The fact that he was super baffled/pleased by his plant magic was also pretty endearing, people who like plants can’t be bad people. She’s…hmm, a little miffed at how his world works and how casual he is about it, but she knows that isn’t his fault so she’s trying to be polite and bite her tongue ‘-‘b But it reminded her vaguely of Selenia’s world so she might poke at it more once her head has cooled. Jumping into those conversations with a hot head leads to yelling matches and those never go over well oops.
IDK ANY OTHER QUESTIONS TO ASK…tell me about your eventual list of people you want to app
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OH MY GOD. WE ARE GOING TO BE HERE ALL DAY EVERY DAY. okay ffffffor memloss team games, in no particular order,
1. kirito (di[e]ce) - aather
2. belca noctircus (+c: sword and cornett) - aather
3. albireo/kazushi watarai (.hack//AI_Buster) - aather/deco/kyriakos
4. lily rammsteiner (DOGS: bullet & carnage) - aather/deco/kyriakos
5. asagami fujino (kara no kyoukai) - aather/kyriakos
6. ada vessalius (pandora hearts) - aather/deco
7. chiffon fairchild (freezing) - aather/deco/kyriakos
8. belldandy (ah! my goddess) - aather
9. sakura (cardcaptor sakura/tsubasa reservoir chronicles either or) - aather/deco/kyriakos
10. menma/meiko honma (ano hana: the flower we saw that day) - deco
11. vercingetorix (air gear) - deco
12. thorfinn (vinland saga) - deco/kyriakos
13. anshin'in-san/ajimu najimi (medaka box) - aather/deco/kyriakos
14. emukae mukae (medaka box) - aather/deco/kyriakos
15. makoto tachibana (free!) - deco
16. SOME OCS LET'S JUST COUNT THEM AS ONE - deco
17. niwa daisuke (d.n.angel) - aather/deco/kyriakos
18. ruler/jeanne d'arc (fate/apocrypha) - aather
19. hachiouji rui (code:breaker) - aather
20. tenpouin yuuki (code:breaker) - aather/deco/kyriakos
21. tomoe (kamisama hajimemashita) - aather/kyriakos
22. kurosaki mafuyu (oresama teacher) - aather/kyriakos
23. quaxo/mr. mistoffelees (CATS) - kyriakos
24. ardois (be calm) - deco/kyriakos
25. sawada tsunayoshi (katekyo hitman reborn!) - aather/kyriakos
26. kiyoshi teppei (kuroko no basket) - aather
27. someone from d. gray man idk road or miranda - aather/deco
. . . . i think that's mostly everyone. w. weeps tears of blood.
apple's feelings on sapphire right now......
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also you don't want those feelings its too many feelings
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i have problems
are you sure
ok a list of things haruki wants right now
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as for cecilia she reallly really really likes takshaka and i'm not sure what else to say can i just link my response to debs I'M SORRY. . . . COP OUT. . . . .
reverse me
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thorfinn/rider "how do i love you, let me count the ways"
forrrr thorfinn, there's a lot more that rider represents than just himself - the kind of person he wants to be, the kind of person his father would approve of, the kind of person his father is, and also a life of meaning. a lot of thorfinn's memories are pretty ehhhh in emotion! ehhhhhh. killing a bunch of people ehhhhh. making fun of a princess ehhhhhhh ok that's kind of funny but ehhhhhh. he's living but he's not. . . . very alive. but rider is! rider's pretty animated! rider makes a bunch of faces and he doesn't want to take memories without other people around him because they're too intense and that's not exactly something thorfinn wants, actively? neither is he very appreciative of them being signegs and rider being broken every time, but they light feelings in him - like,
"wow, i've never felt that way with any of my memories, i don't feel really sad (except when my dad died) but i've never felt very happy either, beyond my childhood memories. am i that emotional about my memories? . . . . no. do taking my memories really do anything for me? . . . . . not most of the time. that's a thing that rider does. other people do that too. hhhhhuh. . . . ."
and "i don't know what to do when you feel bad but i want to help but i don't know what to do, i have no idea how to help and i don't think there is even a way to help but i want to help? i want to help. . . . . !!!"
so it'ssss a mix of concern, helplessness that attaches to that concern, but also a tiny bit of . . . .not jealousy, but sort of a hint of wistfulness added with more concern and confusion and a little self-reflection. wow you sure are people and in touch with your feelings and you have life-enriching memories. i sure. don't. huh. hmmm. i wonder what it would be like to have all that. . . . . well i don't really care to ride on emotional rollercoasters but maybe not, but it's something i can sometimes think of anyway.
uhm i rambled on about that BUT ANOTHER THING RIDER REPRESENTS is the future! a future of a life that actually has meaning instead of. . . being a waste. . . . like his life is. and rider is hope, rider is moral compass, rider is a lot of things that he probably shouldn't be for thorfinn but he is and i guess this is why you're never getting rid of him and if you ever do get rid of him he will be not-so-quietly devastated. he would never be able to have the same interaction with someone else as he does with rider again.
like, for example - just physical reaction, he's very used to rider by now, he's not used to having people touch him or touching other people but rider is the exception, he's ok with rider squishing him, but he could never let anyone else do that, the closest is kitsunebi with snuggling but rider just casually ok let's hold hands let's hug ok i'm going to leannnnn on youuuuuu. ok. and of course all of this is expected to some degree, because boyfriends \:U/ rider is irreplaceable to him and there's a lot i could say but i'd be essaying all night if i kept talking, so i just wanted to go over something that i realized i never went over. rider is a lot of things to thorfinn that makes him irreplaceable because rider is essentially the flavor of his life. without rider thorfinn's life would be as tasteful as idk military rationed bread.
which also makes thorfinn curious and questioning as to why it would be creepy or otherwise disturbing to put his name on his body. \:U/ if it was out of infatuation, perhaps, but it's more - rider is just His Life. there's really no way around it, thorfinn just kind of. . . . revolves emotionally around rider and that's pretty much it. so what's weird about inflicting a scar that represents the person who is love of his life!!! (no thorfinn that's not the point everything else is the point this is why you are socially inept)
hmmmmm i feel really scatterbrained right now and there is just SO MUCH?? to talk about so i'm going to cut it there and let you ask me about other things yes. o/ REVERSE ME TOO.